chuck
if you can see chuck norris, he can see you. if you can't see chuck norris you may be only seconds away from death.
chuck norris' tears cure cancer. too bad he has never cried.
chuck norris does not sleep. he waits.
chuck norris is currently suing nbc, claiming law and order are trademarked names for his left and right legs.
the chief export of chuck norris is pain.
when chuck norris roundhouse kicks people, they do not die of blunt trauma or tissue damage. they simply lose their will to live.
when the boogeyman goes to sleep every night he checks his closet for chuck norris.
chuck norris does not hunt because the word hunting infers the probability of failure. chuck norris goes killing.
the quickest way to a man's heart is with chuck norris's fist.
the grass is always greener on the other side, unless chuck norris has been there. in that case the grass is most likely soaked in blood and tears.
chuck norris appeared in the "street fighter II" video game, but was removed by beta testers because every button caused him to do a roundhouse kick. when asked bout this "glitch," norris replied, "that's no glitch."
selected excerpts from the original list, found here . certain content may be offensive to some readers.
2 comments:
What's with the recent Chuck Norris fad/obsession sweeping across Canada, affecting mostly males?
I know it's a little late to posting a comment to this post, but I just found out that Chuck knows about the list. Whoever first wrote each of those is mostly likely dead now. Check out this Fark post for more clever additions to the list. That is, if you think you can handle it.
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